This may be one reason why I get so little done in a day

Generally, I am in constant (non-aerobic, because I’m mostly a sloth) motion and do “stuff” from the time that I rise in the morning until the moment I burrow back into bed at night. It has recently started to bother me just how much more there is always left to do at the end of the day, and then this thing happened (more on that below) and it occurred to me that I may have discovered one of the reasons why I spend so much time doing many things but am never actually done.

One day last week, I had this whole super-snazzy Instagram post typed up and (almost) ready to go, when one of my kids asked to use my phone for some school-related task. Although I should have known better, and in fact, I do know better, I handed over the phone without first copying my post into a Note, and saving it for later. I don’t suppose I need to tell you what happened, but I will anyway (since that’s pretty much what I do around here). As it happened, upon the return of my phone, when I double-clicked the Home button to pull up IG again, yes, you guessed it, IG acted like it was our first time seeing each other that day. UGH. Double Ugh. Ghosted by my own phone. So typical.

That one act of parental selflessness, as a result of a single moment of (play-acting at) adult responsibility, all of my witty musings, my twenty minutes of tapping away on my phone, and what was likely destined to be my IG equivalent of my pièce de résistance, was forever lost. For what was this sacrifice made, you ask? Well my friends, not surprisingly I’m sure, it was for not less than the eleventy-billionth picture of our cat, Lucky, refusing to look at the camera or pose nicely, or do anything remotely cooperative. So yes, I suppose the (absolutely imagined and fictional) loss suffered by the literary and social media worlds is nothing when compared to glory that is this picture of our grumpy cat in the snow: 

Captivating image of Lucky vs. the snow, yes?

I am left wondering, however, for which class my eleventh grader needed a current photograph of our cat, and for what purpose? I mean, has the eleventh grade changed that much since I was in high school? Oh wait, yes, yes, it totally has. We didn’t have cell phones, smart phones, the internet or virtual learning. If we wanted to show off pictures of our pets, we had to actually carry printed photographs around with us, and well, frankly, I’m pretty sure any kids who did that were immediately decimated and jammed inside a locker for the rest of the day. Or maybe I just went to a particularly intolerant high school and I was part of the problem? Ugh (although, and for the record, I never stuffed anyone in a locker, nor ordered anyone else to do it on my behalf, so there is that, right?).

Thus, in my typical wordy fashion, a short story made way-too-long, I’m almost certain that the reason that I spend so much time getting so few things done is that I’m basically crap at adulting. And I have also need to work on my feelings of gratitude for having such a prize cat instead of slagging her off for being grumpy (I mean, look at her role model, right?). And also, I’m pretty sure that I have now completely lost my previous (crazy) train of thought, and cannot re-create my lost post. But take me at my word, it was going to be pure magic. Sigh.

Giving thanks and asking questions

I love blogging. I love sharing information, recipes, stories and issues with everyone who reads the blog. I love writing something that resonates with another person, makes someone think about an issue in a new way or brings an issue to someone’s attention for the first time. I love the give and take of blogging, the sense of ‘finding one’s tribe’ and the sharing of ideas and quips. The thrill that I feel when any one of you leaves a comment or thought, sends me questions or emails, shares my posts with others in your social circle is akin to the thrill that I get when presented with a fresh-from-the-oven gooey pizza (and I can promise you, my excitement is almost pathological in those moments). My cup, she runneth over. And please do not even get me started on the jubilation that a new follower, reader or ‘Like’ can induce. So, for that, I must give enormous thanks. But thanks are cheap. So I’m giving thanks AND asking for your input (it’s that give and take one thing in motion, see?).

And now – the whole Question!

What are your thoughts on blogs that run contests, giveaways and the like, (interspersed with their regular content)? Are they gimmicky? Are you less likely to take them seriously or more likely to visit regularly to see if they are offering anything for free that interests you? Are you more or less likely to subscribe, Like, Share, and Follow or unsubscibe, Unlike, and Unfollow a blog that incorporates giveaways into their line up? What do YOU think about giveaways and contests on blogs. Yay or Nay? Go for it or Go away?

Please, I want to hear from you! The more comments, opinions, thoughts the better. One of my goals this year is to use 2017 to start realizing my vision for The Keswick Blog. And let’s be honest, between you and me, without readers, and without bringing interesting and engaging content to the table, it is just another online diary documenting my madness for my own amusement. And that is not what I’m going for here. I am already overexposed to my own madness as things currently stand.

Comment here on the blog, on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, email, or whatever your preferred method of communicating is – Contests and giveaways, yay or nay? Why? And what would  you want to see more or less of this year? ????‍♂️


There is curiosity and then there is this.

Every now and then, for giggles, I check out what search terms bring people to The Keswick Blog. It’s usually fairly entertaining mixed with a dash of terrifying. This time around is no different.

If you’re reading this, and you got here using any of the following search terms, I’m sorry. This ain’t that blog.

The ‘It Ain’t That Blog’ List

  1. women to f**k in keswick on – No. Go away.
  2. naked child – NO. Go far away.
  3. keswick jerk off – Nope.
  4. keswick cocaine – Negative.
  5. keswick slut – Don’t know any, anywhere.
  6. keswick naked girl selfie – NO. Are you still here?
  7. keswick slut video – NO. Please leave.
  8. sti infection on hand and nail – Um, what? You can get an STI on your hand and nails? Oh barf. Thank God for monogamous marriage.

BUT, if you’re reading this post and you got here using any of the following terms, welcome! Please stay, click around, leave some comments, share with  your friends and come back often. Because YES! It is that blog.

The “Yup! This is the Blog’ List

  1. chickens never wear shoes – Winner, winner, chicken dinner! You have arrived!
  2. bullshit messages – Um, yup. You want ’em, We serve ’em up.
  3. keswick splash pads – K-Rock has a ton of them. But Beaverton has a great one too.
  4. cutest baby monkey ever – Not sure, but now I need to Google that because I wanna see the cutest baby monkey ever, too!
  5. keswick mom blog – Accurate. I’m a mom. I’m in Keswick. I’m living the blogging life.
  6. banana with red core – This is an epidemic. Still haven’t purchased at Costco since that discovery.
  7. keswick blog – Accurate! Stick around and send me blog ideas (or snacks) (or books) (or cash) (or pictures of cute monkeys, whatever).
  8. failure as a mother – Well, this one is a bit judgy and mean sounding, and I’m not entirely sure that I’m okay that you landed here, but, I’ll own it. Welcome!

I love blogging. I get to hear the most interesting stories, talk to people I normally wouldn’t have the opportunity to talk to and share the ridiculous minutia of my life with other people you just get it. Except for those fuckers from List One. They don’t get it at all.

Happy. Happy.

I will have you know that I am an excellent speller. Automatic spell check is just a dick

I can spell. I promise, I can. I was never graded lower than 8/10 on Mrs. Ceni’s spelling tests in the third and fourth grades and my spell-tastic star only continued to rise from there. That is what we call ‘proof,’ right?

So, now that my spell-tacular credibility has been solidly established,  I will also swear that IT happens almost every time I blog. I write, I review, I edit, and I re-read, I spell check (both using program and the human-eye kind) and when everything is perfect(ish) I hit publish. And that is when  IT happens. Somewhere between the final edit and review and the post going live, that craphole Spellcheck leaps in and deletes, changes or moves a letter so that I look like a slack-jawed, illiterate dolt.

Honestly now, Spellcheck, cut it out. You are killing my self-esteem and ruining my reputation. I may have to break up with you. And you know what? It is most definitely NOT me. It’s you.

Off to dig through the basement and find my old Smith and Corona typewriter. ????????

Off now to dig through the basement and find my old Smith and Corona typewriter. ???????? I’ll work out the actual ‘how to publish a type written blog’ issue later…

Is social media holding us hostage? Nope, not me. Bye, Felicia.

On the topic of social media, volumes have been written, discussed, debated, studied and meme’d. Until now, I have not taken the time to throw my thoughts on the subject out there for discussion, but I feel that it is time. And I am also overdue to make a change in my life.

I was late to the social media party (big surprise, right?). Everyone had a Facebook account before I ever logged onto the site. Everyone had Twitter, Instagram, and Google+ long before I decided to look into what they were all about. And honestly, it is all bullshit. Sadly, the memes are true. The articles citing how much time people waste on social media are true. The studies showing how social media is adversely effecting mental health are bang on the money. Social media is not only documenting, but encouraging, promoting and accelerating the demise of the basic principles of human decency.



I consider Facebook (never even looked into that Myspace thingamajig), and Twitter to be the O.G.’s of social media being as those are the sites with which I am the most familiar. Facebook, to me, was a way to re-connect with people I grew up with or people who I had met along the way but who, because of circumstance or geography, I could no longer see face-to-face. It was a way to share family pictures and have a laugh. It was a way to be nosy without being obviously nosy (less obvious anyway than binoculars and a Whisper2000 headset). It satisfied the voyeur in me and it was never supposed to attempt to encroach upon other areas of my life. It was entertainment.

Twitter, I have come to conclude, is mainly an outlet to complain about everything. 140 characters of hate. 140 characters to tear other people down. 140 characters to make yourself sound cute or funny or kind or clever or hard done by or tough. It is not a site that I’ve ever been a big user of personally (the blog has an account), but it is also not a site that has ever provided me with anything other than sadness, aside from Jimmy Fallon’s links to The Tonight Show (❣) clips. I had one Twitter rant about some blatant law-breaking not being enforced one night but in hind sight, I should have blogged that story. Next time.
IMG_3665Everything that is wrong, (and in fairness, very occasionally a few things that are right) with humanity is laid out for all to see on social media. For every “thanks for paying for my coffee at the drive thru this morning, you made my day so I paid it forward!” post, there are fifty “thanks for cutting me off on the highway, motherfucker. If I see you again, I’ll run you and your family off the road, shitdog.” posts. And that truth, that naked hatred,rage and ugliness is what makes me cringe. It is what makes my stomach hurt. It is what makes me want to shut it all out and not see it anymore. But not seeing it does not make it go away. Not reading the petty or dishonest posts does not make them less ugly or vicious. Knowledge is power, the more you know the more you grow, keep your friends close and your enemies closer, karma is a bitch, and so on and so on. Sure, these ideas can be applied to social media, but what power does it give me to know that people are behaving horribly to one another? Does knowing that there is a ‘pay-it-forward’ movement in the Tim Horton’s drive thru this morning make up for all of the fake, ugly, angry or merciless posts? For me, it just does not. And so I am (willingly, happily and a little bit shakily) walking away from all of it for a while.

When she wrote this, the magnitude of ways to waste time was beyond the scope of the imagination. No matter how much we tell ourselves that we're enjoying zipping around (anti) social media, it's still wasted time.

When she wrote this, the mindless multitude of ways society would invent to waste time was beyond the scope of the imagination. No matter how much we tell ourselves that we’re enjoying the time we spend zipping around (anti-) social media, the truth remains that it IS still time wasted.

I am reclaiming my time. I am reclaiming my hobbies, interests and heart. I am reclaiming my leisure time and my right “not to know.” In the end, I am reclaiming the substance and depth in my life over pettiness and superficial bosh.

Until further notice, I will not be on Twitter. I will not be on Facebook. I may not even be on Instagram very much. I will continue to write and of course blog (because I love writing, blogging and connecting with like(wonky)minded people and I need to continue to do so as part of taking care of myself). Links to new blog posts automatically publish on social media sites, without my involvement, but if you need to get in touch with me, text, email, or comment on the blog because I am now on a social media hiatus for an as yet undetermined duration.


I over-write far too often. Or I use too many words. Or something like that. Shit.

I just caught myself doing it again. I’m not sure if it’s insecurity, anxiety or just stupidity, but I will write, for example, a blog post, and I will be so worried that people may read something into my words other than what I am trying to convey that I’ll write three times as much just to make sure that any questions or arguments that may be raised against me are addressed in the original post. And see this? I’m about to do it again. But I saw it in time. So I stopped. Because that’s how changing one’s behaviour is done. And it’s also called a life lesson in stopping shit that just stresses you out even more than when you make the trek (10 minutes by car) up to Sutton only to find that the ice cream shop is all out of your favourite flavour (every. single. time. Get it together Kawartha Dairy – that Chunky Turtle or Caramel Snappers or whatever the hell ya’ll have named it could be a life-changer for me – if I could ever get my hands on it, that is. Think of the children, Kawartha Dairy. Do it for the children).

But, as usual, I digress. I know – there’s no fun in always trying to make sure nobody steals your cat or keys your minivan because of some random rant on a blog, but that’s how my mind works and it’s the curse of being someone who despite her best efforts, still wants people to think that she’s not an astronomical shit bag of a human being.So, instead of explaining why I’m ranting about something and trying to make sure that I’ve given enough information to take the sting is out of whatever offensive thing I say next, I think I just need to let ya’ll decide if 1) I’m being an asshole 2) I’m trying to offend you and 3) you need further explanation on something I’ve said.

I can’t promise that I will never write another wordy post. But I’ll try to make more of the extra words really satisfying curse words or Wiccan spells or recipes for most delicious baked goods and fewer of them covering-my-ass explanations. My ass is already WAY covered by my comfy-cozy jammie pants thankyouverymuch.

I shall end this post here. But not before sharing with you this award that I won today. I’m super stoked because I never win anything no matter how hard I cheat. Feel free to give yourself one of these kick ass medals as well, hell, wear it to work tomorrow and share your glorious victory with your work mates (but only if it applies to you because this is now a cheat-free zone). No worries though, if you had a slip-up today, come back when you’re back on track. I’m rooting for you 😉



You’re welcome.

I’ve reached new heights of procrastination

Well, I did it. I finally forced myself to look at the list of my blog posts. WordPress very helpfully (read: spitefully) indicates the status of each post. And, noticing that there were no less than FOUR posts on page 1 with “Draft” beside it, I decided to dig a little deeper. Going through the most recent four pages, there were TWENTY posts with that mocking label slapped on the end of them. I stopped digging at that point. Because, well, twenty. That’s why.

Unfortunately, the truth is that I work in a fairly chaotic way. I usually have six or more things on the go at any one moment and bounce around between them. My mind is always at work either in constant dialogue or composing, planning, dreaming, and scheming (in a non-sociopathic way, of course). And rather than working on one thing from start to finish and moving on, a job well done, and all of that, I start things, work on them, walk (or run) away from them either out of frustration, necessity or distraction. And then I get wrapped up in doing whatever else catches my eye and I’m (clearly) very remiss at returning to finish up what I was in the middle of when I turned away (although it continues to live in my mind, nagging at me at weird times throughout my day).

I hate finding out things like this about myself. These things just do not reinforce my self-image of not being a total doofus. Eh. Moving on. I’ve decided to tackle two of those ‘Draft’ posts a week until they are all either written and published or deleted and burned in disgust. I figure this will solve two problems. One, writer’s block will not be a problem because I have a tonne of work already started (yay me!) and two, it will help me clean things up and get back on track working on projects that I want and need to in order to keep mind and soul together and not be bogged down with such a menagerie of thoughts, projects and ideas.

There are so many things that I want to do with these last 50 years of my life and I really do not want to waste a moment (after all, realistically, I’m only really figuring on having a smidgen over 18,000 productive days left) dealing with clutter, literal or figurative, that does not promote health, happiness or a sense that I am fulfilling my purpose on this planet. Because:

Or just do laundry. Or just be sad. Or just eat. Or just sit around and wait. Or follow someone else.  (image found on Pinterest)

Or just do laundry. Or just be sad. Or just eat. Or just sit around and wait. Or just follow someone else. Or just cry about my dress size.Or just constantly struggle. Well, you get the idea. (Image found on Pinterest)

I’ve taken on another adventure – Epicure in the ‘wick

I’ve been A.W.O.L. for a while now, unable to do much of anything other than basic ‘life’ and have, in all honesty barely been doing an adequate job at that, but amidst all of my mediocre efforts/results at ‘life’, I recently decided to become an Independent Epicure Consultant.

I have never done anything like this before. I’ve purchased from other women selling various products – Thirty-One, Grace Adele, Scentsy (currently investigating, never purchased yet), so I can appreciate the actual process of catalogue purchasing, but I’ve never decided to try to SELL anything like this before.

Most of the companies are started by women, for women and Epicure is no different. But one difference is that it was started by CANADIAN women Canadian women. And I kind of dig that. Also, I have a terrible time finding products that I feel that I can trust, are limited or devoid of chemicals, additives (like MSG, tonnes of sodium, tartrazine, etc.) that I can afford to purchase ON A BUDGET. Enter, Epicure with amazing food products, cook and bakeware, recipes, and teas. If you enjoy cooking, or just really good tasting food, it’s worth a second look.

If you’d like to check out the current catalogue, or even place an order or host your own party (online is fine – not everyone has time to have 10 people over to their house for a tasting party), here is the link to my consultant site (Canadian shipping addresses only). Everything from Epicure is gluten-free, so no worries on that front, and many items are now Non-GMO verified (and more are going through the process all the time), which, for me, when it comes to what I am feeding my family, is increasingly important.

February Specials - The After Ate tea is to die for, but so is just about everything else here!

February Specials – The After Ate tea is to die for, but so is just about everything else here! Is it smart for a self-diagnosed Food Junkie to be working a business in the food industry? I don’t know, but I’m going to have a ton of fun finding out!

So, while I want to do so many things everyday/week/month (oh, I also, joined the gym, am trying to re-teach myself piano, trying to write consistently, photograph my rapidly growing babies regularly, keep the house reasonable, the meals prepared, the clothes washed (if not folded and put away), work and earn at four part-time jobs and now Epicure too!), I continue with to struggle of trying to be everything to everyone, do everything I want, need and must do, and falling short at every turn. But slowing down or downsizing what I take on doesn’t appear to be part of my DNA.

But, at the end of the day, I just need to do better, work harder, try more and I’ll achieve my goals. Right? Isn’t that the way we’re told life works? I sure hope that wasn’t just a great big lie that I’ve fallen for.

My character challenge for the second half of February.

My character challenge for the second half of February.

2014 in review – This year on The Keswick Blog

This will likely be my last post of the year. A little bit because my house is a complete tip and upside down after Christmas and I need to spend the time pulling everything back together for New Year. But mostly because I’ve successfully (winning!) procrastinated until December 31st. Like a boss. So, because I like to start the New Year with a clean, organized home, today is my last chance to blog in 2014, my last chance to get 2014 right and my first chance to get 2015 right. Shoot for the stars, that’s my motto. Or at least that should be my motto. It sounds so much better than ‘fuck this noise, I’m hiding under my bed with giant peanut butter cups and my iPad.’

So, in 2014, what brought people to the Keswick Blog? Every now and then I like to check out the site’s stats and see what people are searching that brings them to the blog. It’s usually terrifying and disturbing a) what people are searching for on the internet and b) that these searches lead them here. Without further ado, here are my top baker’s dozen of search terms this year (in no particular order):

1) keswick sluts – Nope, wrong blog. You won’t find any sluts here. Ain’t nobody here but us nuns.

2) chickens never wear shoes – I know, right?!? That’s what I tried to tell that guy, fake Steve, but he wasn’t buying it, but this just proves I’m not alone in this belief.

3) pickupfucker – I’m not even sure what this is or what they are looking for so I cannot be sure they that they won’t find it here.

4) snoring ain’t sexy – Yes, yes, I know that. I think it’s wrong, but until we get some big corporate money behind it, nothing will change. Ya’ll have seen that ‘pee happens’ commercial, right? Well, spontaneous peeing didn’t used to be sexy either, but look at it now!

5) keswick lap dancing – Unless lap dancing is happening at one of the handful of bars in Keswick (and I wouldn’t know since I don’t venture out after dark or without at least one minor minion), I think the people looking for lap dancers in the ‘wick will have to find a lap dance the old-fashioned way. Like at a strip club (which, unlike Tim Horton’s shops, I’m pretty sure, Keswick is woefully without).

6) real chickens don’t wear shoes – This is still true. They just don’t. But maybe those poser chickens wear shoes like mad. I’ll keep my eyes peeled for shoe-wearing poultry (real or fake).

7) shut the fuck up im talking – Um. Okay. Dude, you came looking for me, remember? This is my turf. But being that I am the consummate Canadian, I apologize. Sorry, you were saying?

8) am alwayes falure – Now you are too hard on yourself. I’m sure that you are winning at something and that you are not always a failure. Sure, I’ll give you that spelling is not your forte, but I am willing to bet my last stick of butter that you are the shit at tying your shoes.

9) a failure of mother – Not sure if these were searching for a failure of a mother or looking for support for being a failure of a mother. Either way, depending on the day, they may have hit the jackpot here.

10) is june cleaver in sixteen candles – June Cleaver (a.k.a. Barbara Billingsley) was absolutely NOT in Sixteen Candles (1984). However, the incredible Joan Cusack was and Joan sounds a little bit like June, so I get the confusion. You are forgiven. Check out IMDB for the entire cast and crew listing. And while you are at it, get educated on the classic films of the 80’s.

11) dirty granny ass hole – I have no words. Go away. There is nothing for you here.

12) chickens never wear shoes movie – A movie? Did someone say a movie? I smell a colossal blockbuster here. Unless of course the chickens hire hackers and intimidate the studios into never releasing the movie by slowly releasing internal emails that very few people in the world care about. But that could never happen. That would be insane.

13) sometimes i feel like giving up then i realised i have a lot of motherfuckers to prove wrong pictures – You, my friend, yes you. You have found your place on the internet. Welcome to the flock.

And so there you have it. 2014 at The Keswick Blog, in a nutshell. And now I am ready to jump on 2015 like a fat chick on cheesecake at a Weight Watchers meeting and have a great year. I’m still toiling away on my resolutions and goals for 2015. But I already know the first one – to blog like no one is reading. Oh, wait a minute. I may have already nailed that one *grin* Welcome to another year of my stream-of-consciousness blather. Happy New Year!


Miscellany madness. Memories, kids, hiding from zombies and generally not being a lazy fucker

This post turned out a lot longer than I intended when I started writing. I think this is a strong indicator that I need to post a little more often so there is less awesomeness cluttering up my already cluttered brain. 😉

These are the times to create the memories for our kids.  While they are still young and want to hang out with us, and think that we’re the smartest, the strongest, the biggest, the prettiest, really just the best ever.  We choose the kind of memories to create for them, but we don’t choose what they remember.  If we are always in front of a screen, be it a television, computer, or phone, and usually too busy, distracted or irritated to talk with or listen to them, we are creating memories for them.  Will they remember that you were always really busy and trying to do things to further your own well-being or that of your family, or will they remember that you were usually unavailable to them?

If we power down the electronics, turn away from the screens and turn toward the warm cuddles, the insane ramblings and innocent sharing offerings, will they remember that you always had time for them, that they came first and were cherished by you or will they remember that you were a lazy fucker who didn’t work hard enough to make more money, and give them more ‘stuff’ to do while you were trying to check just one more thing online?

I know which type of memories I want my kids to take into their adult lives and I’m willing to risk them thinking that it was laziness rather than love that caused me to share that extra cuddle on the couch, play that game of Wonder Pets, or read that one more chapter at bedtime.  I’m choosing to step out from behind my screen – be it my laptop, iPad or phone – and give more of myself, time and attention to my kids and helping them to have the kind of parents they deserve to have.


Oh, I’ll still blog, check email, read frivolous TMZ stories, check Facebook and my money-saving apps, but I’ll limit the number of times I do it in a day and the amount of time that I give it.  If I really need to spend time on the computer, blogging, planning, budgeting or editing photographs, I’ll save it for the evenings, after my smalls are tucked away in their beds, dreaming of filling happiness buckets, demolishing shit, doing burn outs and all things Hello Kitty, Barbie, singing and dancing.  Once they are deeply into their dream worlds, only then will I turn the screens back on and finish what I need to finish.

Our internet connection has been spotty this past week.  We’ve figured out the problem starts and ends with our router.  Which is no big deal, except there are about eleventy bazillion wireless routers on the market right now and figuring out the best/right/budget friendliest unit is proving to be a bastardly and drink-inducing task.  I share this grievance (read: whine) only because the unexpected and rather pleasantly painless side effects of this forced internet hiatus have been plentiful.  With intermittent internet access:

  1. I have gotten so much more ‘done’ around the house;
  2. I have spent so much more time just being with my smalls;
  3. I have been forced to take the time to think about my life and what it is that I want and how I’m going to get there;
  4. I have realized that checking certain sites more than once a day is a complete energy and time suck that I do not need to promote;
  5. I feel more positive, motivated and healthier when I spend less time online.
  6. I have ‘found’ the time to dip my toes back into other interests I never seem to have the time to pursue.

BUT, I do love me some (read: a lot of) internet, and it’s been a very long-term relationship (online @ home since 1996’ish?) so I’m not going to be hamster-shit crazy and cut my connection off completely.  I need this virtual link to the outside world, I need to blog, read, research everything under the sun and check the Weather Network often (apparently I am reaching at OCD levels of dedication to the latter).  And before you scoff allow me this: When I use the word NEED in this paragraph, I am acutely aware that if (when/tomorrow/whenever) the zombies storm Keswick and screw with the crazy voodoo that makes the internet rise every morning like the sun, that I will be just fine without my virtual connection to the world (I don’t get the greatest wireless signal while hiding under my bed anyway), but until that day, I frickin’ NEED it.  Stop judging me.


So, my next task is to figure out how much time I NEED on the internet every day, how much time I SPEND on the internet every day, and finally how much internet time I can CUT and still get done what I need to do.  And that is what I will be doing this month.  I have a lot that I want to accomplish this year and in the coming years.  I do not want to waste a moment of time doing things that a) have no value, either spiritual, emotional or monetary b) bring no joy to me or those around me c) break shit that I need to replace or d) cause me to miss out on the opportunities that present themselves every day to have adventures, big and small, alone and with people I love to share my time and space with.

So, I’m asking.  How do you juggle all of the demands on your time?  How do you get things done that you want to get done, things that you need to get done and things that just have to get done in order to keep body and soul together?  And most importantly, does YOUR wi-fi work when you’re hiding under your bed?

P.S.  I have so many blessings in my life that I could never fully do justice to them with my clumsy words peppered by highly inappropriate language I offer here, but I will tell you that having a tripod (Christmas present from Mr. K.B.) for my Rebel DSLR has increased my love of photography ten-fold (and I already loved it A LOT), and is helping me to conquer my fear of being photographed and for that I am happy, grateful and thankful.  This is another positive step forward toward a more positive and optimistic existence.  And I’m all for positivity.  Just as long as I can still have a potty mouth, that is.