Five things that I suggest you no longer do. Ever.

In my effort to live a more positive, non-judgmental based and happier life, I thought it would help to release a list of the first five things I think people should never do. And if people follow my suggestions, that will help me attain my goal of being more serene, forgiving and positive. And it will help just oodles of other people too. I just know that it will.

Thou Shalt Not:

1.  Leave the toilet seat up.  This one is mostly for the men out there, but it applies across the board.  I’ve voiced my discontent with finding the toilet seat up before, only to be told “well, we don’t complain that YOU keep putting it down.  You need it down, we need it up.  We have to touch it to put it up when we need to go, so it’s totally fair that YOU have to touch it to put it back down when YOU need to go.” And to that I say – NO.  If I have to be the one who cleans the toilets, is responsible for ensuring the supplies are available and stocked (almost without fail), then I think the LEAST that can be done for ME is to ensure that I don’t fall in the fuckin’ thing when I need to pee.  Cannot we not all just agree on that one, please?

2. Text and drive. Or hold your phone in front of your mouth and talk while you drive (putting your cell on speaker phone isn’t hands-free fuckball). Aside from the fines imposed when busted for breaking this particular law, consider this: If, one of these days, while texting ‘whr r u?’ to your sucknuts friend, and your car drifts over the line into the oncoming lane and actually succeeds in causing an accident, big or small, involving me or not, Karma, with a capital K, WILL find you, and she will make sure that your genitals burn with the fire of a thousand STI’s, your dogs will forever have plugged anal glands, and your cell phone will never carry a reliable signal again (and may even spontaneously combust in your pocket or bra one day, because that’s a real thing. Because KARMA) . And the reason is simple. Texting and driving or doing that fake hands-free thing is bullshit, but Karma is a queen and will sort your shit out.

3. Waste one more second of your life waiting. What are you waiting for? Tomorrow? Next week? Next month. The time is now. Yesterday is gone and doesn’t matter. There is only now and tomorrow. Stop wasting your time, stop waiting. Do SOMETHING. Television, the internet (yes, I said it), too much sleeping or eating, or just sitting is robbing you of your life’s energy. Stop being scared by life. If you’re overwhelmed, remember – bite-sized pieces.  I don’t care what you say you want to do, what you intend to do, what you feel like you can do, if all you do is the same old things, nothing new, nothing wonderful is going to happen. Make wonderful happen. Make happiness happen. There are no ‘do-overs.’ We all get one shot at this thing called LIFE (reincarnation beliefs excluded) and we only get a limited time to make our lives happen.

4. Tear other people down. People don’t need someone else to tell them how much they suck. Most of us know our flaws, faults, shortcomings and mistakes. But most of us are also trying our best to fix ourselves, make things better and live happier lives. We don’t need to judge other people about how they parent, eat, spend, speak, live or love. We don’t need to be critical of those we love, our spouses, children, parents, friends. God knows, there are enough people in the world who are going to try to tear them down, that we should be concentrating on building them up, praising them, loving them, supporting and cheering them on. It is not bullshit to make someone feel like they are important, that they are smart, special, and unique. I am just as guilty as the next of this one – but I’m fighting like hell to change that.

5. Take more than you give. Always aim to give more than you take. Be the first to offer help and the first to allow yourself to be helped. People who love you need to be able to make your life easier, better and happier, just as you need to do the same for them. Helping others makes all of us feel better about ourselves and it well, helps other people. How can that be a bad thing? Unless you’re helping others to score crack or poison their boss. In that case, helping is a very bad thing and you should stop immediately. But generally, helping is good, so don’t wait to be asked, tune into your life, look around and see where the people around you, no matter who they are, need help and then, well, help. Not because you have to, are asked or want something from them in return, but merely because you WANT to give to that person in that moment.

So, this is my list of the first five things I think people should stop doing RIGHT NOW. What are that do you think that we, as a people, should just stop doing? What should we start doing? What would make your life better if people around you would start or stop doing? Share – email, comment, Facebook, Twitter, courier pigeon – whatever, just talk to me!